Last year I came upon the neatest toys ever…Bunchems! (I know you’ve probably heard the horror stories of Bunchems creating a tangled mess in hair. Relax, guys…I keep ponytail holders on hand for just this occasion. I’m all about Bunchem-ing responsibly.) These nifty toys connect together like velcro and can be used to make anything you can imagine. The possibilities are endless…it’s a therapist’s dream toy.
Recently, I began prompting my clients to use the Bunchems to create a representation of each emotion. (Think Inside Out movie). We’ll spend time crafting an angry creature, a sad creature or a joyful creature, etc. We sort colors, we add legs, arms, eyes and horns. We diligently work until all our primary emotions are represented.
The cool thing about these emotion creatures is that it is IMPOSSIBLE to create one that is not 100% adorable. Believe me, I’ve tried. Even when we are creating a more daunting emotion, like fear or anger, they always end up looking hilariously cute.
The lovability of these creatures is not accidental. Our actual emotions should endear us in the same way as our Bunchems emotions! Our emotions often get a bad rap. We are taught to control, repress and hide our emotions. From our childhood we learn strategies for stuffing these emotions away so that by adulthood, we are likely professionals at hiding our emotions. Often, when a single tear manages to squeeze its way out of the corner of our eye, we ashamedly say, “I’m sorry…I don’t know why I’m crying.” The irony is, in working so hard to restrain our emotions, we deny our bodies of their natural means of releasing emotion.
Telling ourselves not to feel an emotion is a little like saying, “Don’t think of a purple chicken!” See what I did there? When we use our energy and attention to push our emotions away, we are actually bringing them to the forefront of the mind. We unintentionally give them the very mental energy and power that we work so hard to preserve!
Our emotional state is always in flux. For that reason, I have often heard “Don’t act in your emotions.” While we shouldn’t REACT in our emotions, learning to act on our emotions is exactly what we are intended to do! We are meant to befriend our emotions! Get to know them. Learn to recognize them when they are in their infancy. Welcome them into our life. Listen to what they are trying to teach us and how they are wanting to motivate us!
For my next several blog posts, I’ll be introducing you to each of these Bunchems buddies and explaining how they can be useful in our lives. I’ll discuss the intention of each emotion and strategies for making friends with each of them. I’m excited to share and hope you’ll check back in to experience them in all their glory!
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